ASSC: ASSCon-LV3 Journal (Part 1 of 2)
Las Vegas, Nv.
Thursday, 01/08/98
ASSCon-LV3: The Strip
NOTE: While rummaging through my archive of half-started posts, non-
posted personal journal entries, and/or miscellaneous ASSC-related
files on my hard disk, I came across this partially-written journal
entry about my experiences during ASSCon-LV3 from earlier this year.
Beings how I've been in a slightly nostalgic mood lately (OH NO, say
it ain't so!), I decided to clean it up a bit and post it now, albeit
VERY late. Sorry, LMR, for the delay... ;-).
This post is dedicated to LMR, JimForte and everyone else involved
for organizing and helping to make ASSCon-LV3 such a huge success.
* * * * *
ASSCers and friends: Princess DEVON, Danny, CP-One, CP SYDNEY, NC
MORA, JADE-BLUE ECLIPSE, The Panty Guy, Dirty Dick, Sullivan
Titwillow, Dr. Mazoola, TIFFANY, TEENA, Marc182, LMR, MsGINGER, DARA
LYNNE DAHL, CARA ST. JAMES, Dyn0, SERENA.
PROLOGUE: Decided early on last year to attend the 1998 Winter
Consumer Electronics Show (CES) and planned ASSCon-LV3 in Las
Vegas... hell, it'd be fun to get reacquainted with the porno biz
again! And besides, Cuzzin ALS and Brother EDIE had all but convinced
me to go with their giddy anticipation of meeting porn stars
(ESPECIALLY God Rocco and Taylor Wane). And if I didn't already have
enough of a reason to look forward to it, slim Gummi-eatin' redhead,
Mastah of Ass, Mistress of All-Who-Sniff-Bwutt, IRC CAPS-LOCK GIRL
AND Chez Paree dancer, Princess DEVON, excited by all the LV talk by
dancers and ASSCers at CP, asked me in October if she could join me
as my LV traveling companion... "Make sure we get a room with one of
those 25-cent vibrating beds", her only request. Sure... NO problem
:-).
However, after months of giddy anticipation and ultra-high expections
for CES and ASSCon-LV3 (on IRC, at CP, etc.), the few weeks leading
up to the trip were, for me, marred by personal setbacks, work-
related stress and, of course, the holiday blues. So I hoped that
this Las Vegas trip would be stress-free, a vacation to relax and
take it easy.
* * * * *
Thursday, 01/08/98
Arrived in SF at 940am to pick DEVON up early enough for breakfast
and 1150am flight out of Oakland. She's running a little late (having
JUST stepped out of the shower), so she suggests, as a way of saving
some time, meeting her at Coffee Rons (aka Red's Corner) for
breakfast. Sounds good to me. While sitting at the just-painted-dark-
brown-and-still-WET bar waiting for her, I wind up chit-chatting with
the graveyard shift bartender (didn't catch his name), day shift
bartender (and CP manager) Danny, and later Red's (and CP) owner
CP-One, who can't resist saying, "Hey Bubs, you're here pretty early
today!" ;-). Hell, even CP SYDNEY passed thru the bar at some
point... WTF, it's 10am?!
DEVON arrives awhile later (1020am) and we order breakfast. She:
bacon (with lotsa fat please!) and eggs. Me: pancakes. Not sure why
but the pancakes took a little while to prepare. No problem though,
we certainly have enough time to make our flight. While eating
breakfast, we spent a considerable amount of care trying (but not
quite succeeding) to avoid getting the bar's new paint on our
sleeves, pants, hands, face, etc.
As she finished eating, DEVON suddenly realizes she forgot to pack a
few things, so she suggests running back to her place to get them and
asks me to meet her there after I finish eating my late-arriving
pancakes... uh, ok. By now, it's 1105am... still enough time to make
it (hell, Oakland's only minutes away, or so I think). After a brief
wait at her place (1115am) we finally get ourselves together and head
for Oakland.
Hmmm, these lights on 5th St. take awhile to change... 1125am and
we're finally on the Bay Bridge... "Uhm, DEVON, I think we're gonna
be cuttin' it pretty close... so when we get to the airport, I'll
drop you off at the express baggage check-in while I part the car".
1130am and we're on the main road to the airport. This is gonna be
REAL close. 1135am as I drop DEVON and our luggage off at the
Southwest curb and she awaits curbside check-in. 1140am as I find a
long-term parking spot. 1145am as I jog with my backpack and
briefcase to Terminal 2, only to find that our gate is actually in
Terminal 1(!) so now I'm sprinting like a madman... God I hope our
flight is delayed! Fortuitously, I catch up to DEVON on her way to
the gate. We're depart Gate 17... so let's see, we're at Gate 24,
Gate 23, Gate 22... wait... now we're at Gate 1?! WTF??? Gate 2, Gate
3... huffing and puffing... I've stopped looking at my watch for fear
of what it shows time-wise.
We arrive at Gate 17 to find the area deserted, the door closed...
1154pm. FOUR MINUTES LATE! And damn, wouldn't you know the flight
left EXACTLY on time. We missed our flight... First thought: Damn
pancakes! ;-)
Anyways, the attendant at the gate says that boarding the next direct
flight to LV (at 245pm) won't be a problem, so we wander back to the
gift shop area to sit and chill a bit. I'm sweating profusely. DEVON
turns to me and says with a smile, "Oh well, what kind of adventure
would this be without Bubba and DEVON missing a flight?" Yeah, damn
right ;-).
Turns out that Vegas has been cold recently and DEVON forgot to pack
a heavy jacket, and we have enough time to make it back to SF and
retrieve it... so it's back onto I-880 and Chez DEVON once again.
After picking up her jacket, we return to the airport at 220pm and
pick up our boarding passes (whew!). DEVON then says how she could
really use a cigarette so she leaves to try and find a designated
smoking area. Meanwhile, I wait in the boarding area.
It's 235pm and "children and those needing assistance" are allowed to
board. No sign of DEVON but hey, we still have lots of time. "Those
passengers holding boarding passes 1-30 are now allowed to board". Oh
well, we have cards 33-34 so... Let's see, wait, is that her? Nope.
"Passengers holding cards 1-60 are now allowed to board". I begin
pacing. Hmmm... where could she be? Wonder if she knows what time it
is? "All passengers are now allowed to board at this time". Pacing
real quick now. 242pm and the boarding area is now empty, except for
the podium ladies sorting out boarding passes. Beginning to get a
little concerned. Uh, can I have someone paged please? Just then, one
of the ladies points and says, "Is that her coming?" Princess!!!
Woah, we almost missed our second flight ;-). In fact, we're the
second to last people to board the plane, and we take two vacant
seats in the emergency exit row in the front of the cabin, facing the
rest of the passengers.
As I stuff my briefcase into one of the overhead compartments that
still had room, I hear a female voice yell out, "Hey... Bubba?" I
look around as I snap the overhead shut and see a woman with a window
seat waving at me... it's none other than former-New Century dancer
MORA!!! (whom I haven't seen since '95). I return a hello wave but
the plane is just about to depart so we use hand gestures to say
"let's talk in Las Vegas".
Quiet flight, Princess leafing thru her artwork (some with nude
figures), the mother and son sitting across from us tried not to
notice ;-).
* * * * *
Our flight arrives at McCarran Airport (LV) at 350pm, and as we
deplane, I chat with MORA a bit before heading out toward baggage
claim. I'd forgotten that MORA was a "regular" at the annual CES
adult video convention. In any case it was so nice to see her again!
As DEVON and I wait in the large baggage claim area at McCarran, I
notice JADE-BLUE ECLIPSE, in her distinctive spikey blue hair, walk
by. I call out her name and we exchange a quick greet/meet. Turns out
she came in on the same flight as us, and she'll be representing a
"leather booth" at CES! Cool.
We collect our luggage (damn, I gotta get me a bag with wheels like
DEVON's!) and next stop, Alamo Rent-A-Car. No counter in the airport
(uh oh...) so we catch the Alamo shuttle at the curb. After arriving
at the Alamo station, I wait in a ridiculously slow moving line AND
then at the counter (the first car they assign me, my agent refuses
to rent to me because he admits the car is "unacceptable" based on
past customers' comments - I mean, if it's unacceptable, why even
continue to rent it out?), but afterwards we do have a car: a white
Chevy Cavalier. Needless to say, after this experience, I will never
patronize Alamo again!
...and FINALLY, it's off to the Strip! The LV Strip that is :-).
Arrive at the MGM Grand and after driving completely around the
building, we use the valet parking service... something we would do
the rest of our stay there. Valet parking, like, rules.
We wander in wide-eyed at the site of the immense, brightly colorful
MGM Grand main lobby. We immediately encounter a man making balloon
animals when we enter and I see a gleam in Princess's eyes. "Can you
make a monkey?" Without saying a word, the man whips out a balloon.
Blowwww, twist-twist-twist, black pen to sketch a face. "Hi Chim
Chim!" a happy Princess exclaims as we walk towards the registration
desk.
630pm and we finally check into our room: Emerald Tower, 24th floor.
Woah, what a view! We relax in the room for a bit... nice to finally
be here. No more than 10 minutes later, the phone rings. It's LV-
friend Andy (who I met at last year's CES, a mutual friend of porn
star Brooke Waters) calling to ask about my CES plans. No plans yet,
maybe let's get together tomorrow. I lay back down and mention maybe
having steak for dinner tonight... how 'bout Ruth's Chris Steakhouse?
Princess says sure. So I make a dinner reservation for 9pm at the RC
on Paradise. Shortly after another phone call... it's my longtime
porno-perv friend The Panty Guy (TPG)! Seems he just returned to his
room after a long day of CESing and was checking in to see if we had
arrived yet, and if so, did we had dinner plans? I mention our
reservation at RC and invite him and he accepts. I leave a message
for Sullivan Titwillow at the Luxor and a page for LMR. At 815 Sully
returns my call and invites us to his room after we finish our
dinner. Cool.
DEVON and I pick up TPG at his motel at 845pm and head on over to RC.
A little bit of a wait so we wait in the bar until our table is
ready. Short wait (not anything like our two hour wait at the other
RC on Flamingo 2 yrs ago!). Princess orders king crab legs and filet
mignon ("surf and turf"), TPG the ribeye, and I have the large filet.
OHMYGAWD yummy! Princess practically inhales her food... yeah, I
think she liked it ;-).
We finish dinner and head for the Luxor. As we wander about the Luxor
lobby, looking for either: 1) a phone or 2) someone who knows where a
phone is... we run into TPG's and my perv friend Dirty Dick wandering
around in the lobby!!! Turned out he was staying cheaply at the Luxor
thru a security guard friend who works at the Luxor. DD offers to
take us up (past security) to the 27th floor for a panoramic view of
the hotel. And what a view it is.
Sully and "friends" are on the 20th floor so after taking a
combination of the "wrong" inclinator and the fire escape stairwell,
we finally arrive on his floor, and, voila(!) room.
Princess volunteers to knock on the door, and we are greeted by Sully
who invites us in. We four (DEVON, TPG, DD and I) walk in and are met
by Dr. Mazoola, TIFFANY, TEENA, Marc182, LMR and MsGINGER. Turns out
DARA LYNNE had just left to go downstairs to find drinks and ice. So
DEVON decides to run downstairs to try and find her... uhhhh, ok ;-).
A little while later, DARA LYNNE, WITH drinks, returns, WITHOUT
DEVON! Oh well, we all agree that she'll eventually find her way
back.
In the meantime, after putting away the drinks, DL volunteers to
strap my dog collar around my neck. And soon enough, DEVON returns to
the room (and given the complicated nature of the Luxor's
inclinator/floor design, THAT was no easy feat ;-)), and she soon
winds up in the bathtub with DARA and MsGINGER... and woah were they
ever smokin'! ;-). Moments later, LMR, Sully, Maz, and TPG join them
in the tub... for a group photo that is.
CARA ST. JAMES, after a few "stops" along the way ;-), finally
arrives at the Luxor... JUST in time to leave with us to go for
breakfast/dessert. It's 115am so we just go downstairs to the all
night cafe. OGM takes my leash and as we walk, we discuss "life,
inner-strength, happiness", etc. As we're seated around the table
it's DEVON (across from me), TPG, Maz, DL, LMR, CARA, Sully,
MsGINGER, and me, chained by the leash to the table. Everyone else is
starving and are gonna order dinner, but TPG, DEVON and I order
desserts only. DEVON and I share a chocolate mud pie-type thing and a
banana split. And DEVON also orders a vanilla shake. DEVON says, "Oh
man Bubba, you're gonna gain A LOT of weight on this trip!" ;-). I
help OGM decide what she wants to order... the "Burgers of Hathor"?
What's Hathor, I ask. Not surprisingly, OGM knows ;-). As she
explains it to me, OGM catches the waiter not offering her a choice
of salad or soup, and "grills" him into making sure he wasn't trying
to short-change her. In addition, OGM finds out that none of our
waiters know what "Hathor" is... what kind of joint IS this anyway???
Afterward, OGM and I continue our discussion about the geometrics of
life, or something. We all agree to meet at the Private Dancer booth
at 2pm tomorrow for lunch. Towards the end, Dyn0 and his BYOD SERENA
arrive and sit at our end of the table. But by 215am, we're done
eating dessert, and TPG needs to get back to his motel (has to get up
early to pick up his SF friend Steve at the airport) so we three depart
from the group and take TPG back to his motel.
After we return to the MGM, DEVON and I decide to do a late-night
sight-see check out the Oz Buffet and while we peer thru its closed
gate, make a mental note to try and eat there sometime during our
stay. Then we encounter an overpass (over The Strip) leading directly
to New York, New York, so we decide to take a walk. We enter NY, NY
and gaze at the amazing detail of the casino's NY-motif. We then
stroll thru the NY, NY casino area, weaving our way around and
through the various "boroughs". After awhile, we're both exhausted,
so we return to the room at 415am or so. Lights out.
-Bubba